(via nathanieljames)
(via nathanieljames)
afghanibanani::via hellaposer)
HEYOOOOOOO
A Yankee fan shows his support for the team. However, if you’re in a position to read what the top of this guy’s head says, chances are you’re his daddy.
Dennis: If he starts banging Aunt Donna, we’re gonna have the Garbage Pail cousin in the mix.
Dee: NO! No!
Charlie: Whoa. Who’s the Garbage Pail cousin?
Dennis: Gail the Snail is the Garbage Pail cousin.
Dee: Oh, Charlie, she is the worst. We’d have these family parties and she’d just glob on to me and Dennis. Oh she woul— couldn’t get rid of her!
Dennis: The only way to get rid of her was to torture her and that’s what we did.
Dee: Yeah. We’d throw her in the dryer, we’d throw salt on her.
Dennis: Yeah, we’d throw salt on her. ‘Cause she was the snail.
Dee: Get it?
Dennis: You throw salt on a snail and…
Dee: It’s supposed to shrivel up.
Charlie: Well, that sounds a little messed up though, huh?
Dee: You don’t think we’re proud of that, do you, Charlie? You don’t understand, that’s the only way you can handle her.
Dennis: Yeah, she made us do those things. And quite frankly, I resent her for it. What kind of a person salts another human being.
Dee: It’s terrible.
Dennis: There’s no joy in salting someone. Everyone loses.
via gifbin
sydneyesque / thesounknown / annahinks / dashedlines / Chris Piascik
Arrested Development got canceled because there were approximately nine of us who watched it while it was on the air, and that wasn’t enough to get it renewed. We were very vocal supporters, and told all of our friends there was a reason it won the Emmy for Outstanding Comedy, and we definitely had water-cooler talk every Monday morning trading favorite quips and figuring out that George Sr. built houses in Iraq, and all of our friends looked on, uninterested. And then it was canceled and we were bitter, angry, unhappy, watching those last four episodes that aired in a two-hour block against the Olympic opening ceremony on a Friday night in February.
And then a few years later your friends started bringing up in random conversations that they were starting to watch it, and they said things like “Yeah, it’s really funny” and you wanted to stab them because you had been saying that for at least four years, and you started to notice when you went to someone’s house they had the DVDs out on a bookshelf or the show listed in their favorites on Facebook and they started being like “This show is so funny! I can’t believe it got canceled!” and you thought
FUCK YOU.
what she said.
Dear Chase,
I feel like I can call you “Chase” because you and me are so much alike. I would love to meet you someday. It would be great to have a catch. I know I can’t throw as fast as you, but I think you would be impressed with my speed. I love your hair, you run fast. Did you have a good relationship with your father? Me neither. These are all things we can talk about, and more. I know you have not been getting my letters because I know you would write back if you did, and I hope you write back this time and we get to be good friends. I am sure our relationship would be a real home run! Rooting for you!
Mac
(via sofaloveseat)
i will always reblog this
That is an awesome cat
(via caitygee)
Memes hate women.
Jackie: What is it that you do again?
Charlie: I’m a janitor- um, I’m a full-on rapist. Y’know? Um, Africans, dyslexics, children, that sort of thing.
Jackie: I’m sorry. Did you say you’re a full-on rapist?
Charlie: No! Did I say that? No no no no. I help people, you know what I mean? I’m a philan- philan- philan-
Jackie: A philanthropist?
Charlie: Yeah, that’s exactly what it is. It gets blocked in my mouth, I don’t say it no good.It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia 5.05 “The Waitress Is Getting Married”
